In the jellybean jar of life….

Whenever my girls get upset about something and I’m trying to console them, I always say, and they echo me…”In the jellybean jar of life…this is the black jellybean…the one that no one wants…”   Eight years ago that thought came into my life as I was riddled with pain that was unimagineable.  I could barely get out of bed, every muscle, nerve ending, bone in my body was screaming in anger at me.  I listened, probably for the first time in a very, very long time….and went to the Emergency room.  This was going to be the beginning of a very long, painful journey, one I was not ready to go on, one that I am still not ready to go on.

The doctors ran some tests, took some xrays and discovered that my kidney function was below the acceptable levels.  I also had several kidney stones in my left kidney.  I also had a cyst that ruptured on my ovaries.  They sent me home with pain medication, antibiotics, and told me to make sure I called my doctor in the morning…..

I knew my family doctor for almost 18 years, and I considered him pretty much the best doctor in the whole world…and much more, I knew he cared about me.  Together we were going to set out to figure this thing out and make me whole again.  That shouldn’t be hard, should it?  Just take some medicine and I’ll be ok, right? Hardly.  My travels began, each kidney was xrayed, poked, prodded, needles were stuck in my arm to the point that I am sure I look like a drug addict from all of the scarring.  I was sent to specialist after specialist, and yet, I still was bedridden, exhausted, in pain, and my body was swollen beyond recognition. 

I was sent to a nephrologist, rheumatologist, hematologist, you name the -ist, I saw him/her.  I was given many different “buckets”, names for what was ailing me, but no one could pin it down to one specific condition.  Meanwhile I was getting sicker and sicker by the day. 

My darling daughters were soooo good thru all of this, never complained, helped around the house, helped me get around, and did whatever they could to cheer me up.

3 kidney biopsies and at least 20 xrays, and about 5 years later, my travels took me to the Mayo clinic in Jacksonville, Florida….


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